The Art or HeArt of “Listening” Part IV
This is Part IV of a six part series. See my three previous blog entries on September 11, 13 and 18 for Parts I, II & III.
Here I was thirty years old and the “head honcho” of the whole enterprise while the participants were at least in their early 40’s and went all the way up to their 80’s. Also, most of them were rather eminent in their communities or internationally. So, my position as their junior was clearly to serve them all. I had to make sure that the organizational aspects of the event went smoothly and that they were all well cared for. In addition, I had to make sure that the topics that we chose had thematic coherence and that it all came together smoothly. I learned an enormous amount doing this.
One of the most important things I learned was that I had to be “listening” all the time. I had to be a “good listener.” Whether I was running a large meeting or just a small planning meeting; I had to be listening. I had to be listening, too, to mundane complaints such as someone’s room was too small or perhaps the glass of water was not placed correctly on the podium, I had to always be listening.
So, given my age and the position I was in; I had to listen. All I did was “listen.” As well, when I wasn’t at an actual conference or formal meeting, I was meeting with people at my office or talking on the phone all the time. When I was at an event, we would have breakfast, lunch, and dinner meetings. When we were on the beach on Maui; I was in meetings. At six in the morning, I was in meetings. At 11 at night, I was in meetings: Listen, Listen, and Listening.
As time went on I began to see that there were three kinds of people that I was listening to. First, there were the “holier than thou eminences,” as I called them. When they talked about the paper they wrote, or their tradition, or themselves, it was all ego; it was all “look at how great I am”.
The second group of people was incredibly brilliant intellectually and had wonderful things to say, but they were only interesting up to a point. After awhile what they were talking about would give me a bad headache or a severe case of mental diarrhea. They were so caught up in their heads.
Lastly there were the Buddhist monks and other wonderful souls like them who came to these events simply to enjoy themselves and to enjoy the company of others. They just laughed and smiled and greeted you warmly all the time. They were there just to enjoy, to listen, to learn, to just be present.
To be continued on 9 25 06